The Tropes Win! The Tropes Win!

Don't know if this needs much of a preface, minus the "I know, I'm weird" disclaimer. Which really should be the banner headline of the site or something. I'll get on that.

In the meanwhile, enjoy!

Safe Summer PSA

You know for a long while I was the typical Central Park Runner. I was out there 2-3 times a week, thought I was better then everyone else, and hated every ass-clown on two wheels. They never seemed to follow the rules of the road, were way too fast in crowded areas, and were an absolute nuisance.

Then I injured my leg and have been pretty much just biking for the last 6 months. I now know that runners are total butt-pirates. They never heed the signs of the road, don't account for anyone or anything more then 3 feet away from them, and are an absolute nuisance.

I thought a lot about this dichotomy as an argument raged in my head. Whose really worse? And what could bring us together?

I thought it best to write it down.

Cooking With Glass

Not much to say on this one. An idea I had for a product/cooking technique that I think could sweep the nation. Or at least give Guy Fieri another show.

Enjoy,

Law and Order - Nebraska

First things first, I apologize for the week long absence. I spent a good amount of time working on some freelance - non blog stuff - have had some sweet computer problems, and also got drunk and played outside. Doesn't feel fair to blame it entirely on that, but I'm going to anyway. Because I owe you heathens amazing friends and supporters nothing less talky more writey.

And I promise to be more on my game this week.

As for today's piece - I think it's more then just an attempt to improve my comedic writing. I think it's a real world - no bull shit - look at the police force in middle America. And I think those people deserve to have a voice. And since there might be a paycheck in it, it should be my voice.

Enjoy.

The Keys To Victory

This one has been marinating in the old "idea-skillet" for a while now. I am distinctly aware that it pushes some buttons and boundaries, but I purposefully left in a lot of the more "tasteless" content. I feel it added an extra spark of absurdity, and also editing is A LOT easier then completely re-writing.

Sorry if it offends, but I promised two things when I started this. To remain honest, and to do my best to inspire constructive and meaningful dialogue. Those ideals are the backbone of the blogger oath. And even though it was signed in Cheetoh Dust on a pair of my pajamas, it means a lot to me.

Enjoy! (hopefully)

From The Vault: Salesmanship

For the most part I've been trying to keep everything on this site new and fresh. I mean the humor may be - and probably is - old and stale, but the content has been of a recent and current nature.

There are a few things, however, that I feel a need to resurrect and re-issue on this newest iteration of the "Slafta Blogging Chronicles." From now on anything labeled "From The Vault" is a script, post, or idea that has been existing in the old "mind-bucket" for some time already.

Our first entry is a sketch I wrote a long time ago, and re-wrote and edited today. So yes, it was at one point "worse" then it is right now. I know, I am also ashamed. There's a bit of truth and personal connection here, so go easy on me. For I have laid my soul bare. Enjoy!

Total B.S.

I swear to you when - not if - I see this become a legitimate business, I will lose my shit.

A Nightmare Of An Interview

Another idea that's been swirling around in the old "thought-helmet." I won't say too much, I don't want to spoil any surprise.

Also, it's WAY too long as it is. So need to push the limits of your attention further. Enjoy!

Pitch Meeting

Just a first draft of something I wrote up yesterday. It DEFINITELY borrows heavily from Mr. Show ("Globochem" Sketch), and WKYN (The American Masterpiece which is "The Grapist."), but I think it has enough under it to stand on its own.

If nothing else, I'm stealing from good company. So there's that.